View Full Version : A preview: Star Wars story

06-24-2007, 05:09 PM
okay, so this is a small preview of the story I've been writing. I'm not a writer, never was very good at it, but I've had this story in my head for years, and just wanted to get it out. Just this small section has had quite a few revisions, and I'm sure it'll end up quite different by the time I actually finish the story.

Just wanted to get some imput from anyone who reads, see if it's something that sounds interesting, or if I should just put it back out on the backburner.

I haven't come up with a name for the story yet either. :shifty

*edit* stupid vbulletin not allowing paragraph indents :mad


A Long Time Ago, In a Galaxy Far, Far Away…

This story takes place roughly 800 years before the Battle of Yavin.


Coruscant, Capital of the Republic. Inside the Jedi Temple.

Jedi Knight Ben Arkon stepped out of the refresher. He hadn’t had a decent night’s sleep in days. Staring into the mirror, he took a good look at himself. At 33 years old, he’d seen more than his share of adventure in the galaxy. His blue eyes, looking much older than they should, scanned the different scars left on his body, the result of many close encounters. Examining his hair, he found a few gray strands among the mass of blonde on his head and in his beard. He stood 1.8 meters tall. (5 ft, 11 in) As he began to dress, he reminisced about how his life led him to this point.

At 3 years old, he was accepted into the Jedi Order. His years as a youngling were spent as all young Jedi, learning the in’s and out’s of the Force, warnings of the Dark Side, and all that temptation and emotion brought. At age 12 he reached the rank of Padawan. When Arkon was 16, his first master, Skyler Risia, was the victim of a hyperspace accident in the Outer Rim. A rookie pilot made a grievous error when plotting the course of the ship Master Risia was a passenger on. They came out of hyperspace right in the middle of a convoy leaving the planet Manaan with medical kolto shipments. Half of the convoy was destroyed that day, leaving most of the Outer Rim without the much needed medical supplies.

His second, and final master, Jodra Tavus, was struck down by a virus she unfortunately acquired on a mission to the planet Kalvor. Kalvor had been under Republic quarantine ever since. No cure has yet been found. Arkon had achieved the rank of Jedi Knight only 3 weeks prior to her death.

Arkon’s astromech droid Z3-K3, often referred to as ‘Zeke’, beeped a message. “Yes Zeke, I know I’m due to appear in front of the council shortly. Thank you for the reminder” Arkon said. Zeke beeped a rather rude response, rotating his silver and black domed head and turning his yellow glowing optic sensor away from Arkon. Zeke was an older astromech model, with four legs protruding from his red, silver, and black rounded body. At the base of each leg were swivel wheels to allow the droid a full range of motion to get around obstacles.

He continued to dress and put on his robes. He wondered why exactly the council had requested his presence this morning. Had he done something wrong? Or perhaps it was time he was promoted to Jedi Master? “No, I should not presume such things. It’s not my place to speculate on the desires of the council” he thought. With that, he finished dressing, attached his lightsaber to his belt, and walked out the door.


“The council thanks you for coming Ben.” Jedi Master, and Jedi Council member Aeke Sarms said. Master Sarms was a human Jedi with a head of white hair that was once jet black in his youth. He had been serving on the Council for over 20 years now.

Arkon shuddered. He hated the name Ben. He always had. He preferred to just be known as Arkon. “Of course, Master Sarms. It is an honor to be brought before the Council” he said as he bowed before them.

Twi'lek Jedi Master Oial Mublen rose and she spoke with an urgent tone, her head tail’s, referred to as Lekku, were twitching. “We have an extremely important mission for you. It is a mission of utmost importance, and it requires absolute secrecy. No one outside of yourself and the Council are to be aware of this mission.”

Arkon looked puzzled. “A secret mission?” he asked.

“Aye, a very important one” said Jedi Master Hutdur Kian of the Zabrak race. “We have reports that the Sith may be rebuilding their fleet. There is also word that Darth Praxus has found a new apprentice...” he trailed off.

Arkon blinked. He didn’t like where this was headed.

Master Sarms sighed. “This is usually not a mission we would entrust to a Jedi Knight. This would normally be handled by a Master. But this time, we have to make an exception. I can not go into the details for our reasoning, but you must trust the will of the Council.”

“I understand Masters” Arkon replied. “What is it I am to accomplish?”

“We have uncovered the location of a small fleet of Sith Warships. They are protecting a new shipyard under construction in the Vetti system.” said Sarms. “We want you to find a way aboard their flagship, and acquire any data you can on the plans the Sith have. We want to know how large their fleet has become, and where they plan to strike.”

“Our Intel has discovered Darth Praxus has not left Korriban in quite some time, and is not considered to be a factor in this mission” Master Mublen continued. “Should you sense the Dark Lord, you are to abort your mission immediately. Do not attempt to face him.”

Arkon breathed deeply. “I understand, and I accept this mission.”


After a more extensive briefing, Arkon left the Council chambers. As usual, Zeke was there ready to greet him.

“It looks like we’ll be leaving Coruscant for a while Zeke.” Arkon said as he put a hand on Zeke’s rounded dome. “I need you to prep the ‘Krayt’s Tooth’ for our departure, I’ll meet you in the docking bay in an hour.”

The ‘Krayt’s Tooth’ was Arkon’s personal ship, named after the dreaded and legendary Krayt Dragon, a native of the planet Tattooine. It was a heavily modified personnel transport ship Arkon had been working on and upgrading ever since he was in his teens. It had a very rectangular hull with rounded corners, and multiple tints of metal covering the hull from its numerous patch jobs. The cockpit, located on the front center of the ship, protruded from the front of the hull.

Not many Jedi were allowed personal possessions such as droids and ships. Arkon was a rare exception. His abilities with the Force augmented his natural talent for all things mechanical.

“Oh Zeke, we’re also going to need to spoof our transponder codes a few times while we’re away” he told the droid. “And make sure the M8 is in working order. I have a feeling we’re going to need her.”

The M8 was a small 1 person fighter secured in the ‘Krayt’s Tooth” cargo hold. Its long cylindrical hull had small wings on each side, and a tail fin on the rear, designed for entering a planet’s atmosphere. It was put together from scraps and spare parts over the last year and a half by Arkon, and painted black. He designed it to mimic some of the stealth fighters used by the Sith, hoping it would come in handy some day. The M8 flew, he knew that much, but its stealth capabilities had not yet been tested.

As Arkon turned to head to his quarters, Master Sarms appeared in the doorway of the Council Chambers. “Do you mind if I walk with you Ben?” he asked.

“Of course not Master” Arkon replied.

“I know this seems like a huge undertaking, and it is, but there is more you should know.” Sarms said. “We’ve recently lost too large a number of our ranks.” He lowered his eyes. “Too many Jedi have fallen prey to the lure of the Dark Side in this last year. Not just here, but also at the Dantooine Academy. Darth Praxus’ forces have been quickly gaining support in the far worlds. If we don’t find out what they plan, and where they plan to strike, they could have the full support of the Outer Rim in 6 months time. After that, it’s only a matter of time before the Core Worlds, and even Coruscant fall to Sith rule. We can not allow that to happen.”

“I won’t allow it to happen Master Sarms.” Arkon said solemnly as walked slowly beside the Jedi Master. They continued walking in silence.

After a few moments they appeared in front of Arkon’s quarters. Sarms stopped. “I shall not keep you any longer from your mission Ben. May the Force be with you.”

“And with you as well Master.” Arkon replied as he entered his quarters.


And there's the preview. Any comments/criticizims are welcomed. Lemme know if I should continue (I'm already quite a few pages past this) or if I should call it quits.


06-24-2007, 05:22 PM
Definitely continue, man. Very interesting read :thumbsup

06-24-2007, 05:28 PM
I likes it...keep it coming!!

Owner of a Lonely B.A.T.
06-27-2007, 07:33 PM
No man good stuff, but I have to ask are some of these names and characters stuff that exists?

Like book or comics?

I'm not to familar with pre Phantom stuff, and have little knowledge of the comics.

But so far I like it!